Skip to content
- Is BB hungry? No, BB-8.
- What do you call an invisible droid? C-through-PO.
- How did they get between floors on the Death Star? In the ele-Vader.
- How do Ewoks communicate over long distances? With Ewokie Talkies.
- How do Tusken Raiders cheat on their taxes? They always single file, to hide their numbers.
- How do you unlock doors on Kashyyyk? With a woo-key.
- What do you call a rebel princess who only shops at Whole Foods? Leia Organic.
- What do you get if you mix a bounty hunter with a tropical fruit? Mango Fett.
- What kind of spaceship did Luke fly in grade school? An ABC-Wing.
- What position does Darth Vader play in baseball? The Umpire.
- What time is it when an AT-AT steps on your chronometer? Time to get a new chronometer.
- Which Jedi became a rock star? Bon Jovi-Wan Kenobi.
- Why are Death Star pilots fed up with space battles? Because they always end up in a TIE.
- Why was Darth Vader bad at sports? He always choked.
- Have you tried the gluten-free Wookiee treats? I heard they’re a little Chewy.
- How did Darth Vader cheat at poker? He kept altering the deal.
- How did Darth Vader know what Luke was getting for his birthday? He felt his presents!
- How do you stir fry on Endor? With an e-wok.
- How does Darth Vader like his toast? On the dark side.
- How does Wicket get around Endor? Ewoks.
- How long has Anakin Skywalker been evil? Since the Sith Grade.
- I asked my wife to dress up as a bounty hunter from Star Wars. I have a Boba fettish.
- I went to a sale at the Maul. Everything was half off.
- My wife says she’s leaving me because of my obsession with Star Wars. I said, “Please don’t go, honey. You’re the Obi-Wan for me.”
- Oh, sure everyone loves Star Wars on May 4th… Until you tell your nephew you’re his father!
- Trying to come up with jokes about Star Wars is difficult. Sometimes they seem a bit too forced.
- Warning: Star Wars spoilers! Voosh voosh pew pew pew voosh voosh pew pew voosh force choke voosh pew pew pew.
- What did Darth Vader say to the Emperor at the Star Wars auction? “What is thy bidding, my master?”
- What did Han Solo say to the waiter who recommended the haddock? Never sell me the cods!
- What did Leia’s adoptive parents say when she used to sleepwalk as a child? Uh-oh, it’s the rise of Skywalker.
- What did the dentist say to Luke Skywalker? May the floss be with you.
- What did Yoda ride as a kid? A do-cycle. Because there is no tri.
- What do Jawas have that no other creatures in the galaxy has? Baby Jawas.
- What do you call a droid that takes the long way around? R2 Detour.
- What do you call a Jedi in denial? Obi-Wan Cannot Be.
- What do you call a nervous Jedi? Panicking Skywalker.
- What do you call a pirate droid? Arr-2 D2.
- What do you call an over-powered janitorial stormtrooper in the Death Star? A Super Duper Pooper Trooper.
- What do you call it when only one Star Wars character gives you a round of applause? A Hand Solo.
- What do you call two Han Solos singing together? Han Duet.
- What do you need to reroute droids? R2-Detour.
- What does Kylo Ren serve at a dinner party? First hors d’oeuvres.
- What goes, “Ha, ha, ha, haaaa… AGGGHHHH! Thump”? An Imperial Officer laughing at Darth Vader.
- What is Jabba the Hutt’s middle name? The.
- What is R2D2 short for? Because he has little legs.
- What side of an Ewok has the most hair? The outside.
- What sound do Yoda’s sheep make? Day go baaa.
- What’s the internal temperature of a Tauntaun? Lukewarm.
- What’s Yoda’s advice for going to the bathroom? Doo-doo or doo-doo-not-do.
- Where did Luke get his cybernetic hand? The second hand store.
- Where does Kylo Ren get his creepy black clothes? From his closet.
- Which program do Jedi use to open PDF files? Adobe Wan Kenobi.
- Which Star Wars character lives in Florida? Orlando Calrissian.
- Who did Princess Leia’s hair? Darth Braider.
- Why couldn’t Luke find love? He was looking in Alderaan places.
- Why did Anakin Skywalker cross the road? To get to the Dark Side.
- Why did Han Solo wait to ask Princess Leia to marry him? He didn’t want to force it.
- Did you know Fozzie Bear was in Star Wars? He was an Ewokka-wokka!
- Did you know R2D2 loves to curse? They have to bleep out all his words.
- Did you know that Christmas will fall on star wars day this year!? Guess whos coming to town?
- Did you see Kylo Ren at his recital? I heard he killed the solo.
- Do not watch the Star Wars Movie! Contrary to its title, it has nothing to do with celebrity feuds.
- What do you call a bird of prey with a thousand lives? A millennium falcon!
- What do you call a book filled with outlines of Star Wars characters? A Kylo Ren Book.
- What do you call a bounty hunter from the US South? Bubba Fett
- What do you call a falcon that eats avocado toast? A Millennial Falcon
- What do you call a fight between film actors? Star wars!
- What do you call a grunge rocker who has gone over to the dark side? Darth Vedder
- What do you call a Gungan taxi driver? Car Car Binks.
- What do you call a Jedi without an eye? Jed.
- What do you call a potato that has turned to the Dark side? Vader Tots.
- What do you call a Princess who only shops at Whole Foods? Leia Organic.
- What do you call a redneck Star Wars fan? Bubba Fett.
- What do you call a rock star Jedi? Bon Jovi-Wan Kenobi.
- What do you call a Sarlacc Pit that only speaks in ironic mockery? A Sar-chasm.